my baby's six months. let's talk about me.

oh boy, i really need to do an elliot update.  and i SWORE i wouldn't be one of those people who let their second kid get the shaft in the pictures/blog updates/baby book department.  and here we are... update-less since four months.  trust me, the kid is doing some cute stuff & showing us his personality more & more every single day.  i really need to write this stuff down.  and the same goes for parker.  he's wicked smart!  letters, numbers, jokes... he amazes me with his wit & knowledge.

but right now?  i'm gonna give you a little six month post-baby update about myself.  

when i was near the end of my pregnancy with elliot i often got the "are you ready?" question.  of course i wasn't ready!  you never know what you're in for with this kind of thing until you're in it... just like how it was with your first.  you just don't know until it happens.  so when people asked me if i was ready, i told them i was at least ready for the chaos that was inevitably coming & to be in a fog for six months.  and that's how i've felt... foggy.  tired & making it through the weeks one day at a time, making it through the days, one hour at a time, just trying to survive til bedtime.  

in the last six months, i managed to get in some scattered work outs, i've added a couple of pieces to my wardrobe, i've lost some of the baby weight & i've booked & shot quite a few sessions with my biz.  but through it all?  foggy.  tired, worn out, stretched thin & still just not myself.  but that's ok!  it's exactly what i told myself to expect for the first six months.  whenever i got frustrated or like i should be doing more i would say, "amy, you have a four month old... give yourself a break."  and then promise myself at six months i'd start to piece myself back together.  

so here we are... six months.  i am SO ready to be myself again.  to get my body back, to have energy again, to wear cute clothes on occasion, to curl my hair every now & then, to plan & cook healthy meals, to be creative... to come out of the newborn-mom fog.  can it be done?  call me selfish but for my own sanity, i need it to happen.  and trust me, if i'm happy?  my boys will be much, much happier.  all three of them.

so how do i plan on making this happen?  i need tangible goals to keep me going & help me measure my progress.  here are some of those goals:

--> register for the Capitol City Marathon & run 2-3x a week.  i'm not crazy though, i'm not doing the marathon.  there is a 5 mile run & a half marathon... i haven't decided which one i'm doing yet.

--> STOP EATING SO MUCH CRAP.  seriously, my sweet tooth is out of control.  and with nursing it's been so easy to just say to heck with it & eat whatever i want.  well, i gave myself a six month pass & it ends now.  so.  no more.  i'll eat a little something sweet after lunch & dinner (think reese's miniature or hunk of cookie dough) and that's it.  plus one full-on dessert, once a week.  period!

--> go to bed!  this is probably one of the biggest sources of all my problems.  i'm so freaking tired!  but for so much of it, i only have myself to blame for staying up so late... especially now that elliot only wakes up once or twice a night.  so i am going to be in bed every night this week no later than midnight.  bonus points for bed at 11:30... which means i need to wrap this post up in like, two minutes.

--> get dressed in a real outfit at least one day a week other than sunday.  i always get dressed up on sundays for church but all the other days pretty much consist of work out clothes, pj's or just jeans & a hoodie (my errands go-to outfit).  i'd like to put a little thought into an outfit at least one extra time... and that will remind me that my clothes don't really fit me the way i like them to right now, which is probably why i wear all that other comfy stuff.  but i guess that's the point of all of this now, isn't it?

ok, that seems like enough to start.  i'm excited!  getting to the six months mark is a big deal.  my baby is half way to his first birthday & we've survived the newborn stuff.  i'm so excited to be at this point!  and i'm so excited to finally be doing something to feel like my old self again.

let's do this.