so i was kinda starting to freak out this last week.
i mean, seriously? there are only nine weeks left. nine single-digit weeks. we have such a great routine right now, i get a generous break everyday while parker naps, he can feed himself & put on {and put away!} his shoes, and he can pretty much always communicate what is making him mad when there is a problem. we're at a really good place & lately it's been a little hard to swallow how much all of that is gonna change in just two short months. i was in a funk & honestly, feeling a little sorry for myself about how hard life is gonna be for a while.
yesterday i had a reality check. i have no room to feel anything but completely blessed & grateful.
i was standing at an atm next to a bulletin board filled with want ads & for sale posts. one post was a lady giving out her number asking for work around your house... cleaning, organizing, whatever, she just needed extra money to make ends meet. another post caught my eye... a guy who was selling his car so he could buy his wife a special wheelchair since she had MS and her health was deteriorating.
i withdrew money from the atm & walked back to my car & drove home to my warm house filled with my amazing husband & happy little boy. the whole way there i felt kicks from the healthy baby inside my belly & felt ashamed for feeling sorry for myself. how could i possibly have room to complain when there are people all around me with real problems & legitimate reasons to feel sorry for themselves? i felt like a jerk.
so now? i am trying to look ahead with nothing but gratitude & excitement. i mean, i'm still nervous to go through labor again {OUCH} but i am ecstatic to get this little boy here & start our lives as a little family of four. yes, it's gonna be sleepless nights & days without a break all over again but it's gonna be so SO worth it.
on another note, MY BABY SHOWER IS TOMORROW!! can i just say i have the best best-friends ever? my girlfriends have put so much work into this shower & have snuck around making all sorts of plans & i am so beyond excited to see what they've been up to. can't wait to share pictures!
and as for baby boy? he is moving like crazy. i swear he's moving more often than not & my belly is rolling all around from his ninja kicks & break dancing maneuvers 24/7. babycenter.com says this is the peak of baby boy's movement in the belly since room gets tighter here on out, so i'm gonna enjoy this while it lasts.
i love his little activities so much! just can't wait to see them in person.
How fun! Also on the bright side, newborn babies do sleep a lot. This little guy will sleep through noises that would have disturbed Parker - #2 baby will only enrich your lives & expand the love even more than you thought possible. Great insightful post! oxox
ReplyDeleteWere thinking about making #2 soon and i have those fears as well. Also, i feel like my son is perfect. Like, a masterpiece. Everything i ever wanted in a child. I dont want to mess up our relationship or change anything between us by having another. But i would love to have another baby, and a sibling for him. Its tough.
ReplyDeleteyou look great! BABY SHOWER TOMORROW?? say what? Can't wait to hear about it! Happy weekend!
ReplyDeleteI can totally understand how you feel... Sometimes during lunch dates with Parker {my Parker, lol} I get to thinking just how hard it's going to be to do these things when Baby Mason arrives... I just hope that some things will stay the same. Here's to wishful thinking! PS It's okay to feel bummed sad sometimes even though I remind myself the same thing too that there are people out there having it much worse.
ReplyDeleteI have to admit I was super jealous when I saw you were wearing normal clothes at the PNW meetup. I haven't been in normal clothes with this 2nd pregnancy since like 10 weeks. I gain my pregnancy in my butt/hips/thighs first so my pants are always first to go! Then I'm so tall there's no way I'm staying in regular shirts once the bump appears! You're looking great, so absolutely fit and trim!
ReplyDelete31 weeks?!?!?!?! How did this happen?? Crazy how time is flying by. I have fears of having another as well. Last night my concern was how I was ever going to keep my house clean...how selfish is that?!?!?! Made me realize I need to get my priorities in check, quick!
ReplyDeleteYou still look stunning so far along! Got the mothers glow for sure :)
ReplyDeletexo Shane
Amy you look great-I can't believe only 20 lbs! You need to share a post on how to stay fit dying pregnancy. I gained a whopping 50 lbs with my LO and I don't want to go through that again! Although we want another one soon. I definitely have the same fears and anxiety as you. I feel sorry for myself all the time because of our debt, no family nearby, & stupid things like not having a house yet. But I have these reality checks all the time. Like hello I am sitting at work writing this comment on my iPhone and
ReplyDeleteWhoops it froze and ha to publish ;) anyway we all have so much to be thankful for. We are truly blessed in so many aspects. We've got a pretty GOOD LIFE. And I wouldn't have it any other way. God bless the rest of your pregnancy and birth. And have an awesome shower tomorrow!!
ReplyDeleteLove Lisa
www.mummascorner.blogspot.com
Sooooo excited to see this new little man! I can't believe you're only NINE weeks away?!
ReplyDeleteHow cute are you? Seriously! You have the perfect bump! I hope you have an awesome time at your baby shower! You're a lucky girl to get one for your second child too :)
ReplyDeleteYesterday as I was driving home I was kinda feeling a little ho-hum too...hubby is out of town for a long weekend and honestly I wasn't looking forward to wrangling two crazy dogs (who are READY TO GO as soon as I get home) and handling the night time routine by myself. But it turned out to be great night...I loved taking the dogs for a walk with my little guy in the Ergo and then we spent some fun one on one time taking Father's Day pics. I think it's ok (and normal) to feel this way sometimes...'cause at the root of it, you know you're a thankful person who is fully aware of the blessings in your life. But I'm with you...whenever I start to feel that way, I think to myself "um, you live in the USA, have a warm home, a beautiful family and your health - snap out of it!" ;) And as far as your life and routine changing...just think of how fast that super needy time went by with Parker...out of their little lives, the needy baby phase is such a small fraction. There will definitely be trying moments, but I'm sure the extreme happiness that comes with it will make it all work. Having said that, you know you'll have plenty of people who understand when you're just not feeling "quite right". :) Congrats on the single digits and YAY for a fun baby shower!!
ReplyDeleteI really love how real you are with your worries and concerns about life. That said, I can't wait to hear about your baby shower! :)
ReplyDeleteIt really will be hard for a little bit, but once you settle in, everything will get into a new routine. It'll be great and even more amazing than now!! I hope you have a good baby shower. :)
ReplyDeleteI can not believe you are already 31 weeks! Where has the time gone? I can't wait to meet the new little guy!
ReplyDeleteGreat bump update; you are still lookin' great ;o) Your baby shower!!!! That is so exciting! I hope you have an awesome time!
ReplyDeleteYou look soooo cute!
ReplyDeleteAnd ps, those feelings of nervousness are totally understandable. It will obviously be a little different for a bit while you're adjusting to a new little guy, but you will get into a new routine before you know it. And you will LOVE it:)
ReplyDeleteI'm so excited for you! And yes, there are so many things to be grateful for, but don't be too hard on yourself when you have a down day. Maybe we need those days to really remind us of the great days.
Love ya!